Are they real or fake?

Just what is it that makes up a REAL friend?

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
REAL FRIENDS: Are always the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs. Whatever.
REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents MOM and DAD.

FAKE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
REAL FRIENDS: Would sit next to you saying, "Damn, we fucked up good, but it was fun!"

FAKE FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
REAL FRIENDS: Aren’t afraid to cry with you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will borrow your stuff for a few days and then give it back to you.
REAL FRIENDS: Will keep your shit so fucking long that you will forget its yours.

FAKE FRIENDS: Know just a few things about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Could write a book about you with quotes straight outta’ your mouth.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that’s what the crowd is doing.
REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass for leaving you behind.

FAKE FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
REAL FRIENDS: Will walk right in and yell "I'M HOME! WHAT’S FOR DINER!"

FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile.
REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
REAL FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, "Bitch, you best drink the rest of that. You know we consider wasting a drink alcohol abuse.”

FAKE FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Will knock the fuck out of these people.

FAKE FRIENDS: Stab you in the back.
REAL FRIENDS: Stab you in the front.